“The best things in life are free, but you can keep ‘em for the birds and bees.” – The Beatles
2.4 Students and Their Families
International School Students
“The same but different.”
By and large international school students are a joy to teach, just like the academically ambitious, polite, hard-working kids at a well-run private college-prep school in your home country.
The emphasis is on well-run, because of course things can go badly wrong. But do your research and you should be able to avoid bad schools.
What lends spice to an international school student body is its multicultural diversity, even though the playground and hallway language will be English. It’s truly awe-inspiring to see students from 50+ countries mingle effortlessly in the classroom, lunchroom, sports field, social groups in and out of school.
A true international school will be full of TCK (Third Culture Kids.) This means a global education curriculum is redundant; some of these students have lived in five different countries before middle school and have extra pages in their passports.
Issues Unique to International Schools
Transitory Lifestyle
Many of these families only stay a few years (3-4 years for US Foreign Service Officers), which has implications. One of these factors is very positive; because these kids have moved so often, they tend to be very accepting of newcomers.
Student friend groups might include a motley collection of nationalities like Ethiopian, Canadian, Estonian, Belgian, Danish, Lebanese, and Austrian, in the case of my children, who were swarmed by students looking for fresh companions their first day.
But negatives include the lack of stability and issues with bonding and friendship. Some students may fall through the cracks academically and socially, since nobody knew them when. More fragile students may fold under the pressure of regular uprooting.
English-Language Fluency
Two admissions constraints also have a particularly crucial impact, so be sure to ask. How many students speak English well? How solid is instructional support and what are the school’s admissions testing and policies?
One AP teacher recounted how a GR11 student had to have his friend translate a request to go to the bathroom. How can such students possibly get good IB/AP scores and be admitted to a British or American university without English-language fluency?
1. Older students who are not fluent should not be admitted in the upper grades. It is far too difficult to master the language skills needed to succeed in a challenging curriculum and subsequent tests, like IB.
If too few students are fluent in English, teaching any kind of curriculum will be an uphill slog. Many schools do not accept older students without excellent English for this reason and also require a minimum admissions test score.
2. Many schools limit the percentage of ELL under the theory of critical mass, meaning if there aren’t enough native English speakers, who are these learners going to immerse themselves with?
If the proportions are wrong, the school ends up with groups of, say, Koreans speaking nothing but Korean and who can barely speak English when they graduate.
The Families
“The family you come from isn’t as important as the family you’re going to have.
”
Who are these parents?
1. Embassy diplomatic personnel
2. NGO (Non-Governmental Organization) employees
3. Businessmen and women for global corporations
4. Teachers’ kids
5. Host country nationals, generally rich
Who Pays the Tuition?
Parents #1-4 do not typically pay their child’s tuition out of pocket; their government or corporation pays. In the case of AAS Moscow, for instance, fees are in the $28,000 range plus a $10,000 entry fee.
Lori Loughlin, actress, sentenced for bribery in a school admissions scandal. Money talks, but not always.
This feature means that when a #5 host national’s child enrolls, the parents most likely are rich. That does not automatically mean they are more prone to be pushy, entitled, and demanding, but the risk is, frankly, greater.
Lest you think parents from hell only occur overseas, remember this pair and their $500,000 bribe to admit their daughters to USC?
How Parents Decide
Families have many motivations for choosing an international school over the local national school. These range from the negative (teachers are on strike again) to the positive (broadening the child’s worldview and achieving English fluency.)
The growing middle class around the world sometimes stretches itself financially for an international school education. They value extracurricular activities and the nurturing of personality and independence in a multicultural environment because they may be wary of the rigid national schools.
So…parents have settled on sending the child to an international school. What factors influence their choice?
1. Tuition can be upwards of $40,000. Can I afford it? What if I have three children?
2. Will the curriculum fit the future I have in mind for my child?
3. Is this a true international school with certified foreign teachers?
4. If my child needs extra support, will it be available?
5. What about sports and extracurricular activities?
6. Location – if we live in a huge city, is the commute impossible?
7. What is the school’s reputation and college acceptance rate?
Here is one online example of how parents search and the criteria that matter; just input the child’s age and desired location, then start shopping. By the way, this database is a priceless resource for prospective teachers to dig up facts like ratio of local students to international (crucial to know.)
Difficult Parents
Difficult parents are distributed along the Bell Curve, never mind who pays the tuition. There are plenty of horror stories of embassy parents throwing their weight around and making a teacher’s life miserable. Your main defenses are:
1. Solid supportive administration
2. Selective student admission process
3. Curriculum in place with testing as the end result
4. Zero tolerance of cheating or bad behavior by Board and administration
5. Adherence to Western norms
Supportive Parents
On the bright side, parents all share one common feature, meaning high expectations for their children. They tend to be supportive and involved, and if their child is happy in your classroom and making progress, they will be your best supporters.
Highly talented and educated classroom volunteers will be available. The PTO will likely prove capable of raising plentiful money for classroom support, organizing special events, and providing manpower or more typically womanpower. Keep an open mind, and you could end up with a lifelong friend from the parent community.
Now that you have a good idea of the international school world and have decided you want to teach overseas, let’s lay out the hiring process.
4.2 Moving Process
Leaving Your Old Life Behind
“Marie Kondo isn’t crazy.”
Before you start this stage of the process, watch an episode or two of Marie Kondo on Netflix and take her message to heart. Paraphrase “Does it spark joy?” to “Does it fit in my shipping allowance?”
What to take? Teachers tell their stories in this long thread on this exact question.
Downsize - Do Not Ship Junk Overseas
Imagine Marley (Christmas Carol) dragging behind him “the chains he forged in life” and get rid of your junk now as opposed to when you’re dead. Take this golden opportunity to lighten your load.
I recently helped a friend move, and the 24 boxes in her attic had not been touched in so long some had mildewed and she’d forgotten what was in the rest. Nobody had needed them in three decades; try to avoid this error.
Go through every item in your life and ask yourself:
1. Do I use or wear this item regularly?
2. Is this item available in my new country? Avail yourself of the teacher garage sale and confirm what exactly is included in your furnished housing. Then decide what to bring.
3. Run the numbers and work out whether storing the item for two years is cheaper than buying new or used upon return, which is unlikely.
Typical 10 X 10 storage units run in the $100 per month range; that’s about $2,500 for your two-year stint. Is the item worth it? And by the way, your family may not be happy to have your stuff in their basement or garage.
Decision Time
If you have issues with discarding, have a friend or family member work through the process with you, someone merciless. This link takes you to the blog of a trailing spouse in India; pay particular attention to his advice in #3 Make A List.
Now divide your belonging into three categories:
1. To the dump. Remind me why I still have this?
2. Recycle, gift or loan to friends. It could make someone else’s life happier.
3. Take with you on the plane or ship overseas, even if you have to pay out of pocket. The item is that important.
Housing Issues Before You Move Overseas
“Never let a short term desire get in the way of a long term goal. - Curtis Martin”
Renters
Give your landlord proper notice and begin the downsizing process. You will no doubt need to stay those last few days with family/friend at the end. Or maybe you can work a deal with your landlord to stay until you head off to the airport, although the logistics probably won’t work.
Be sure the landlord has your forwarding address or local contact and make arrangements for the deposit return; PayPal works great. I’d also suggest going through the unit and filling out the checkout form together with the landlord in person and take pictures. This means less chance of getting stiffed.
Home owners
When we went to Vienna in 1988, I wish we had kept our house and rented it out. We sold it for $106,000, and during the 24 months we were gone, prices shot up 1% per month. We needed the cash for the move (Lesson: stay liquid) and thought we were not coming back the the US (Lesson: don’t close off any options.)
Sell or keep? Now there’s the question and it’s a big one. However, given the way house prices have been exploding, I would strongly advise keeping your house if at all possible. But some considerations, as landlording is not for everyone:
Will you stay overseas the rest of your life or do you plan to return to your home country someday?
Do you have a reliable, trustworthy agent to manage the property?
Are you comfortable with tenants possibly trashing your beloved home?
Do you have what it takes to be a landlord? Are you prepared to do the work and tolerate the stress?
Do you have cash reserves in the bank to cover unexpected expenses or vacancies?
Home Country Issues While You’re Overseas
Support Back Home
Identify a person you can truly trust, meaning someone responsible who won’t screw up, someone honest enough to have Limited Power Of Attorney and access to your money. A hundred little issues will inevitably pop up in the transition period. More on this in Money later.
Who you gonna call? If you do not have anyone like that in your life, you’ll have to hire people. With online banking and instant communication, you might still be able to manage things. But your overseas life will be a lot easier if someone has your back at home.
Car
If you decide to keep your car, a reliable somebody needs keys to run it around the block once a month or so. Set up auto-deducts and do not cancel the insurance. Finally add up the insurance and monthly payments. Compare these costs to the expense of renting a car for the summer.
You’ll almost certainly need a vehicle if you come home for the summer, so decide if it’s worth the expense and trouble to keep your current vehicle. This might be cost-effective if the car is reliable and paid for.
Retain a US address, a family member, for instance. Some present and future financial transactions are difficult, or even impossible, without one.
Confirm with the school/consulate how or if you might receive actual mail, if absolutely necessary. Mail will probably need to come through the school office. In Russia it had to come through the Embassy in Finland.
Keep track for the next few months and see if anything crucial lands in your mailbox. Better yet, sign up for online notifications and access, meaning go paperless.
Double check on delivery of packages, which will cost you extra postage and time. Remember customs duties and reliability.
Goodbyes
Friends and family are going to want closure and a chance to say goodbye in person. You jumping off a cliff like this is vicariously exciting, plus your departure is a chance for a really memorable party.
Please be aware that those left behind may feel one of two ways. They may
be jealous and feel their own lives pale in comparison to your adventure; they may even feel an unspoken criticism of their lifestyle choices. Just remind them they have a tour guide and free lodging when they visit. Besides, living an adventure vicariously is a lot less stress.
think you’re nuts. The ones who think you’re nuts are happy for you, but literally cannot understand why you would do such a thing. What’s wrong with staying in Portland instead of going to Poland? Just reassure them you’re just the restless sort and nothing is wrong with staying put; you’ll rely on them to keep you grounded.
On The Plane Overseas
“There are few places you can find silence. Air travel could be the last fortress of solitude. - Regina Brett”
Cultural Prep Work
I suggest that you assemble a list of books to read, movies to watch, and blogs to follow about your new country. Just Google such a list for Vienna, for instance, and crank up the Strauss waltzes to get in the mood. You will never be a native in this new country, but one of the best ways to get inside the culture is literature, art, and research.
Lucky there’s a translation on this sign.
There is no reason to be a cultural illiterate either when you arrive. For instance, if a Russian asks your salary, it’s rude not to answer. A Thai would be horrified if you said something negative about the king; it is also in fact actually illegal.
If you can, try to locate one of the CultureShock book series or similar. Learn how to puzzle out street signs and speak basic politeness phrases: hello, thank you, how much is? goodbye.
Yes, you are jumping off a cliff, but don’t jump without a parachute. Do your homework, make yourself a good guest and avoid unforced social errors.
Packing
1. Check airline baggage regulations. Carry on sizes have changed and you might need to buy new luggage. Here is a good roundup of the difference between personal item and carry on, plus recommendations.
Six weeks until your stuff arrives!
2. Confirm how many pounds and bags you can ship with you and the cost. Consider duffle bags, since they fold up to nothing. Remember that if you have a shipment coming later, you need to survive for six weeks on what you bring with you. That, or buy on arrival.
3. Decide what is important enough that you must hand carry; you can always buy another toothbrush. But without these items, you’d be would seriously inconvenienced.
Electronics
External hard drive
Chargers and adapter
Passport with work visa
Important documents like birth certificates
Credit and debit cards
Phone
How to know where you put your passport. (You won’t actually be transparent.)
4. Pre-pack and weigh your carry on. Here is Amanda’s very experienced advice on bag choice, packing light, and luggage for small children. I also like the SCOTTeVEST which looks dorky but helps prevent travel frazzle. Practice accessing passport and phone and be rigid on putting stuff away the same place every time. Reduces the stress.
Flying
Unless you can afford to upgrade to Business or First Class (ha!), you will be jammed into steerage. Oh well. This is an opportunity for meditation and relaxation; after all, you are on found time and all the crazy-busy hard work has been done. You are a leaf floating on a stream in full flood.
Strategies
Plenty has been written about long-distance flying, but here are the basics:
One of the most thoughtful going-away gifts we ever received was a little package for our pre-teen kids: treats, small games, and puzzle books to keep them sane on the long flight.
Hydrate and avoid lots of alcohol
Try to sleep. Melatonin may help and consider asking your doctor for a prescription.
Act as if you are in your future time zone, meaning sleep if it is nighttime in your new home country.
Move around and stretch as much as possible.
Children? Pack a little surprise kit full of distractions. More on this later, but you and your kids will become closer, so start now with real interaction, not digital distraction.
Babies and toddlers? Stick to their routine, provide something to suck or chew for ear-popping on takeoff and landing, and don’t forget their comfort items.
One door closes and another opens.
Arrival
Stagger off the plane and double-check that you haven’t left anything behind. Then go through Immigration. Prepare for long lines and stern-faced staff. It’s not personal.
Next is Customs for your luggage. You shouldn’t have any trouble if you followed instructions. You should be met at the airport by a representative of the school, possibly even your principal or the head of school. A van will probably take you, your new colleagues, and your luggage on the first stage of your adventure.
You’re not in Kansas anymore. Welcome to your future.
First Week
First 24 Hours
Depending on what time it is, you may all go out to eat somewhere, to the school for a tour, or directly to a hotel or your assigned housing to sleep. Or all of the above.
Orientation
Typically the school will have an orientation procedure and people in charge. The most important of these people is your mentor/mother hen/team leader/savior.
This person is the one to untangle the mysteries, herd your cohort through the subway, take you shopping for coffee makers, and provide reassurance in a thousand ways. I will always think fondly and gratefully of Patrick in Moscow and Frank in Vienna.
If you have children with you, the school should help getting them sorted with activities or babysitting. You’ll have time to set up your classroom before the returning teachers arrive, plus social events and outings and practical errands.
You have two other crucial tasks:
1) Bond with your mates
2) Set up your household
Bonding
By this time you will meet your future colleagues, who were probably on the same flight. I met Ann in the PDX airport on the way to Moscow, and we survived the 16-hour flight to Moscow with a plane full of crazed Armenian-American teens on a trip to the homeland. We’ve been friends ever since.
Guess what country we were in?
This is your cohort and over the next days and weeks, you will and should bond and support each other. If you’ve played a sports team or gone through Basic Training, you have experienced this deep bonding.
You will be spending a lot of time together and grow to depend on each other. Remember how often I’ve told you that you’re moving to a small town? If you stay on the international school circuit, you will bump into these people repeatedly.
But for now, congratulate yourself on this accomplishment. Your old life is in the rear view mirror. The next step is to set up housekeeping.
5.4 Family
Couples Surviving Overseas
“Ideally, couples need three lives; one for him, one for her, and one for them together. - Jacqueline Bisset
”
You may be single or overseas with a partner or spouse, plus children. In addition, everyone has family back home. The expat life produces a unique mixture of blessings and strains on families you would not encounter in your home country.
The Department of State even has a separate arm devoted to supporting diplomatic families. “Family life abroad can be very exciting,” they note. But they end with an offer to provide “guidance and referrals to those experiencing personal challenges.” This is a delicate way of saying that it won’t always be easy.
Couples - 3 Scenarios
1. Teaching couple
If you are a teaching couple, you’re going to be seeing a lot of each other - inside the school expat bubble, commuting back and forth to school together, going to the same events and parties, friends with the same people.
2. Business person + teacher trailing spouse
If your spouse/partner does not work at the school and you do, a different dynamic results. The business may demand long hours, lots of travel, and brutal amounts of stress, leaving less energy for the relationship.
3. Teacher + non-working trailing spouse
Or you may be that peculiarity of the expat world: the trailing spouse. It could be the wife or the husband; in the case of this charming blog post, it’s the husband, “In which I discuss how tricky it can be being the expat partner, but ultimately realize there’s way more to gain than there is to lose from the experience.” What puts the trailing in trailing spouse is that the partner’s job brought them overseas. The other half just came along for the ride.
One day in the Moscow library, empty at the time, a parent confided her distress. Her diplomat husband had been assigned a tour to Russia and she’d had to quit her very satisfying career. She wept bitter tears over the painful lack of purpose and loss of self-esteem that was her daily life. All I could do was listen and provide kleenex. I’d been in this exact spot and once spent a miserable spell locked in the bathroom, crying like a teenager.
In many countries the 2nd spouse literally cannot get a work visa or even work online and would in fact jeopardize the visa of the 1st spouse. That would damage the relationship of the organization or business with the local government. This means the unemployed trailing spouse is well and truly stuck in professional limbo. Which leads us to…
Stresses and Opportunities
Strains Unique To Expats
If both partners are on board 100% with going overseas, the adventure can strengthen the relationship and keep even a creaky marriage going longer than it might otherwise. Or the stress can blow open any rifts spackled over at home through routine.
As difficult as it might be to manage, each partner must feel valued. If one of the couple does not want to abandon their life and go overseas, things will almost certainly end badly.
If one of the partners cannot find professional validation and respect, a make-work job or volunteering with the Ladies Aid Society isn’t going to cut it either. “Adultery and fractured marriages are rampant in the expat world,” says Robin Pascoe who has written widely on the issue.
With all the temptations, things can go south. What to do? Talk to each other in depth for a start. If one of you really does not want to go, my advice is, don’t go.
This excellent summary from ExpatFocus Can Your Relationship Take the Strain of Moving Abroad Together? pretty well sums up the difficulties.
Sexual Pitfalls Overseas
The expat life features some sexual temptations a marriage would likely not face back home.
1. Many cultures have a much more relaxed attitude toward adultery and prostitution. Remember that America was founded by the Puritans.
A spouse who is working long hours and away from home a lot may fall into this trap and really not face much social stigma. Except for the spouse, of course.
2. Some countries are havens for sex tourism and mail-order brides and so even a very average-looking expat might be considered quite a catch.
This thread features a lot of snark but illuminates the complicated depths. Remember that frequently it’s not your good looks they’re after but your bank account.
Family Back Home
Single or partnered, pretty much everybody has relatives. Several dynamics peculiar to the expat life are in play. Let’s focus first on the negative aspects of this atypical lifestyle you have chosen.
Aging Parents
Who takes care of aging parents? This can be a thorny issue and must be sorted before you get on that airplane. If your parents become ill, will you have to relocate and abandon the adventure? Will you need to take a long leave and return home to make arrangements?
Are siblings nearby and willing to bear the burden? Might you move mom or dad overseas and find affordable care, in Turkey or Thailand, for instance? Could they tolerate the disruption?
These are questions to sort out in advance of need.
Decisions must be made jointly with your other family members.
It all depends on your relationship with your family.
Friends and Family Reactions While You’re Overseas
Instagram Life (Jealousy)
You know how other people seem to be having way more fun on Facebook than you sometimes? Your family back home may grit their teeth when they see you floating down the Venice canals on a long weekend, a trip they have dreamed of for years.
Your adventures seem so exotic (they are) and their life so prosaic (it can be.) The best advice is not to overdo the bragging.
Nobody Much Cares (Indifference)
After you have trotted out a few well-rehearsed tales, people back home typically return to their own concerns. Perfectly normal, and really, what else did you expect? You will discover that the only people who truly understand are fellow expats.
Wish You Hadn’t Gone (Disapproval)
Some family back home may put pressure on you, subtle or direct, to return home and take care of business i.e. mom and dad need help, you dumped your house and financial chores into my lap and I regret saying yes, etc.
Your parents may express horror every time a disaster or international incident occurs anyway near you. Or they may just disparage your choice (What’s wrong with your hometown?) and feel your choice is a put down on them. It’s not, but try to be sympathetic.
They Visit (Excitement)
Best of all, your family is happy for you and will turn up at your door sooner or later. There is nothing like a local tour guide for enjoying a place, so just prepare yourself to host family and friends at some point in your stay.
Grandma had the time of her life.
A few notes. Your visitors have come from halfway around the world and will stay possibly several weeks. You probably won’t be able to take two weeks off work to show them around. Plan accordingly.
Also take weather and season into account. You won’t be touring Dubai in the summer, as the temperature is over 110, for instance. Christmas and the high tourist season in Venice may be way too crowded.
Remember how much hand-holding you needed in the early days and be careful about sending them out the door on their own. Visitors will be rookies just like you once were and will need their hands held.
Advance Planning For Visitors
1. Walk them through the process details (tourist visa, money, customs.)
2. If possible, have them bring an extra duffel full of items you can’t otherwise obtain.
3. Their time will be brief (certainly not two years) so settle on a doable itinerary and prioritize.
4. You will need to do the planning and executing, so start making arrangements. Think about arranging tours and a driver.
5. Think through exactly how long you want this visit to be. Do you need to take some time off work? Can you??
6. Be sure the school is aware you’ll have guests in school housing.
Guests, like fish, begin to smell after three days, according to Benjamin Franklin. Obviously three days won’t work, but the visits can be a strain as well as a pleasure, but a priceless experience for both parties.
Can You Raise Children Overseas?
“So where are you from? Umm...”
Intercultural contact.
Can you take your children overseas? Can you become pregnant, give birth, and raise a small child overseas? Of course. And these children will be different than if they’d been raised solely in their home countries. They will even have a special name and an acronym to match: Third Culture Kids (TCK).
TCK (Third Culture Kids)
First culture means the passport culture of the child. Second culture refers to the host country where the child and parents have moved. This leaves a third culture unlike either but something entirely new. Several characteristics define this third culture. These children:
1. Actually live in another culture for a fair amount of their developmental years.
2. Experience a mobile upbringing.
3. Expect to return to their passport country someday, meaning they are not immigrants.
They might be military brats or MKids (missionary kids) or EdKids (teachers’ kids) or foreign service families.
Temporary Or Long term?
Let’s first distinguish between those TCK whose parents do not stay long nor expect to (tourist teachers) and those who are making a career of overseas work (career IS teachers, foreign service, NGO.) The positive and negative effects will therefore be greater the longer the stay.
Entire books have been written on TCK and their special upbringing. This post revisits the psychological effects of this childhood from the perspective of a grown-up TCK.
Positives?
· Tolerant and with a broad worldview
· Bilingual or even multilingual
· Culturally adept
· Open to new experience
Negatives?
· Ignorant of home culture
· Rootless and lack a sense of belonging
· Hesitant to make close friends or develop intimacy
· Unclear loyalties
Special Needs Children
There is no 94-142 Education for All Handicapped Children law overseas. For-profit schools are private and can legally refuse to admit whomever they choose. Even for embassy schools, the State Department advises finding another career path if the family does not pass the suitability review panel; even schools supported by the State Department may not support the necessary education.
That being said, children with special needs can be sometimes be accommodated. This assumes no severe handicapping conditions or behavioral issues, plus you might be doing a disservice to your child. DoDEA schools can be somewhat more supportive.Be sure to verify in advance and please be upfront with the school.
Pregnancy and Nannies
Yes, plenty of overseas teachers have gotten pregnant and successfully raised small children. A few things to consider in advance, as always:
1. What is your present/future school’s maternity policy? You don’t want to find out too late that pregnancy is grounds for dismissal or insurance does not cover maternity.
2. What is the level of medical care in the country and the options for childcare? In many countries, healthcare is considerably cheaper and better than in the USA, but certainly not all.
3. Do plenty of research and ask around before you decide that you need to go back home to give birth.
4. Since you won’t have family support close at hand, what kind of support system can you assemble? Better get started early.
Questions to Ask the School
1. For how many children will the school provide tuition? (usually one per contract.)
2. Any constraints on single parents? How much does daycare cost? Can kids play outdoors?
Hint: don’t count on it.
3. What about children with special needs? Will the school accept them? If yes, how much support is available?
4. Is it a true international school, meaning plenty of other TCK’s? Or is it an international school in name only where 90% or more of the student body speaks the local language and the only foreign faces are teachers’ kids?
National School
What about enrolling your child in a true national school? i.e. the public school just down the street. You might be setting your child up for:
Bullying. True TCK are largely very welcoming. After all, they’ve all been the new kid many times before and know how painful it can be. Not necessarily so in a local school.
Lost academic progress while your child learns the language.
Young enough children, however, might very well thrive.
You’d need a translator to work with the school.
So…should you teach overseas with children? Heck, yes. The experience is a great gift to your child.
Reverse Culture Shock
As much as you love and miss your friends and families, if you stay overseas for any length of time, ties will inevitably wither. You are simply not there for the day-to-day events that constitute life, and honestly, FaceTime is not an adequate replacement.
You will feel a sense of dislocation back home referred to as reverse culture shock. Holy cats! The toothpaste aisle is overwhelming, and why is everybody in such a hurry?
It may seem you’ve landed in an alternate universe.
You will probably also discover that after a brief flurry, nobody much cares to hear your adventures. They may even feel a bit of implied superiority in your Instagram happy life compared to their mundane lives. At some point you’ll realize the only people who really understand are fellow expats. Unsettling, but there it is.
Going Home
“Home is the place where, when you have
to go there, they have to take you in.
Robert Frost”
The word home has a complicated meaning for an expat, meaning you. It also has a time element it does not have for the citizen who never worked overseas. Let’s examine four of these situations.
(1) During Your Contract
Meaning summers and holidays. Most typically, schools pay for a round trip ticket at the beginning and end of a two-year contract. So if you want to return to your passport country to see family in between, these flights are on your dime.
Plus you might well be couch-surfing unless you are lucky enough to own a home you can afford to keep vacant or can arrange a house sitting gig or house exchange.
I am a member of HomeExchange.com and last summer, a family of teachers from Mumbai worked a deal to stay in my house for two weeks to visit their family in Portland and also manage rentals. I wasn’t going to be home anyway; I’d already been to Mumbai and did not want to go during the rainy season. But still, it worked out slick for them and for me as well.
Summer Options?
§ Go back home for the entire period, which can be intense, exhausting, and expensive.
§ Travel overseas the entire period. This depends on your location, meaning it’s more fun to travel in Europe than someplace really hot. Also, occasionally a school will require teachers to vacate during the summer; avoid a school like that.
§ Mixture of both, perhaps with visitors.
2) Between Contracts
This means you will be rewinding the whole moving process. In addition, here is some advice on breaking the news to your school; remember that recruiting starts very early in the school year.
§ Close out your classroom and school checkout list.
§ Arrange shipping, sell or give away what you’re not taking in the teacher garage sale, arrange airfare reimbursement.
§ Pay off all financial obligations like landlord and utility charges.
§ Document all final payments to be able to leave the country legally.
§ Say sad goodbyes to the other nomads in your herd (IS teachers) and achieve closure, particularly if you have children.
3) Breaking Contract
Sometimes the school or personal situation is so awful that you just cannot tolerate the situation and you break contract.
§ What circumstances would you say justify bailing early or even sneaking out? Safety? Harassment or threats of violence not dealt with by the school? Repeated failure to pay salary on time or egregious violations of the contract? Personal or medical emergency? What justifications would you support? Each person will have a different threshold, so think about it.
§ Will you ever get another job and will you be blackballed? The answer is yes, no, and maybe to both. Reading through these comments reminds me again of the prospective teacher’s overarching responsibility to practice due diligence in advance. Plus the bitter whining in the comments. Whew!
1) Do your homework as well as possible in advance, particularly for-profit schools.
2) Do not rely solely on ISS or Search. You own this one.
3) Watch out for red flags, like when a good director leaves.
4) Keep financially liquid in case you have to pay your way out.
4) Permanently
“You can’t go home again. - Thomas Wolfe”
Actually you can go home again and eventually, international school teachers will need to choose where to nest for good, constrained by whether they can retire or must keep working.
§ Return to your passport country – if you still need to work, you can return to the public school system or try the private school route. Look at Carney Sandoe, private school recruiters or religious schools as well.
Just be sure you haven’t let your certification lapse, although sometimes private schools will give you a pass. There is dispute on whether overseas teaching is a plus or minus in the job market.
§ Remain in-country and go native to one degree or another, bearing in mind that some countries have visa and income minimum requirements. They may not want you and regulations may change suddenly. Ask yourself where can you afford to live and also feel comfortable.
The Same But Different
Family is family anywhere, but the expat’s relationship to parents, relatives, and children has unique twists. At the very least the aspiring overseas teacher should give some thought to the issues in this post and, as always, do the research.